KIRUV CAFE - The Meeting Place for Project Inspire
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An Insightful Kiruv Lesson
This morning, in shul, I ran into a good friend of mine, who is a kiruv pro. I asked him what kinds of programs he ran over Sukkos. He said that at the last minute he and his wife decided to go up north to escape the hot weather here in South Florida. So he didn't run any kiruv programs. I was really surprised. So I asked him, "what about your talmidim?" Here is his very insightful answer: He once heard a story of a very well meaning baal bayis who invited a not-yet-frum Jew over for a meal in his Sukka. The guest was very appreciative, although a bit apprehensive, not knowing what to expect. He arrived and was ushered into the Sukka. There were a few explanations, blessings, etc., and the meal began. The host was knowledgeable and enthusiastic--but the guest could not wait to get out of there! He was miserable, icky, sticky and hot as could be! It was a typical South Florida afternoon--hot, hot, hot! "If this was what you had to go through to be religious," he thought to himself, "I can find other things to do with my life..."
Fortunately, this guest had other pleasant experiences and has grown considerably in his Yiddishkeit and relationship with Hashem. But the lesson is very important. Sometimes in our enthusiasm we forget to think about how someone else, who is not used to doing mitzvos, will perceive what's happening. What seems perfectly normal to us, may be difficult or "hot" for them. We have to take that into account and be prepared, or perhaps choose a different kiruv opportunity. In the story above, maybe the host should have had fans or air conditioning in the Sukka to make it more accommodating, or maybe he should have finished the meal quickly and had an extended dessert in the house. The point, however, is that we always have to remember to look at things from the other person's viewpoint and do our best to make it an enjoyable and happy experience.
Fortunately, this guest had other pleasant experiences and has grown considerably in his Yiddishkeit and relationship with Hashem. But the lesson is very important. Sometimes in our enthusiasm we forget to think about how someone else, who is not used to doing mitzvos, will perceive what's happening. What seems perfectly normal to us, may be difficult or "hot" for them. We have to take that into account and be prepared, or perhaps choose a different kiruv opportunity. In the story above, maybe the host should have had fans or air conditioning in the Sukka to make it more accommodating, or maybe he should have finished the meal quickly and had an extended dessert in the house. The point, however, is that we always have to remember to look at things from the other person's viewpoint and do our best to make it an enjoyable and happy experience.
Comment
The Top Ten Benefits of Doing Kiruv (Source: "Putting Out the Fire," by Aharon Ungar)
1) Working with somebody who is learning from the beginning causes you to examine your own performance of mitzvos.
2) Kiruv reignites your connection with Hashem.
3) Kiruv enhances your appreciation for the Torah community.
4) By bringing Hashem's lost children home to Him, you earn Divine gratitude.
5) Kiruv builds a constant, ongoing source of merit for Olam Haba.
6) Kiruv causes you to focus on spiritual issues you may never have contemplated.
7) You will have an opportunity to relearn many things you have forgotten.
8) You will have the incomparable feeling and spiritual benefit of saving someone's life.
9) Kiruv fulfills four halachic imperatives.
10) You can attain all these benefits within the context of your present life and schedule.
2) Kiruv reignites your connection with Hashem.
3) Kiruv enhances your appreciation for the Torah community.
4) By bringing Hashem's lost children home to Him, you earn Divine gratitude.
5) Kiruv builds a constant, ongoing source of merit for Olam Haba.
6) Kiruv causes you to focus on spiritual issues you may never have contemplated.
7) You will have an opportunity to relearn many things you have forgotten.
8) You will have the incomparable feeling and spiritual benefit of saving someone's life.
9) Kiruv fulfills four halachic imperatives.
10) You can attain all these benefits within the context of your present life and schedule.
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© 2012 Created by Rabbi Aharon Ungar.
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